Holy Fathers on Marriage

As it is impossible that a man who is chaste despises his wife and ever neglects her, so it is impossible that a man who is lecherous and dissolute loves his wife, even if she is the most beautiful. Chastity gives birth to love, and love gives birth to innumerable benefits.

Saint John Chrysostom


You keep making plans… It is not bad, but it is better to put everything into the hands of God – and wait with humility for what the Lord speaks about you, and to accept it willingly and benevolently. Do you want to get married? You’d better put it in God’s hands, too. Dreams about it can stir up feelings and intentions that are not yet worthwhile… What they do is messing with the soul to no avail. …Pray thus, “O Lord, you know how to arrange my life so that I may be saved…

St. Theophan the Recluse


Take care not only to have children on earth, but to bring them up to heaven; do not cling to natural marriage, but strive for spiritual marriage; give birth to souls and raise your children spiritually.

Saint Basil the Great


We know that children inherit not only their parents’ physical traits, but also their spiritual properties… It is thanks to this gracious inheritance that such beacons of purity, kindness and love as the Holy Virgin, John the Baptist, Isaac, son of Abraham, shone in the world. This makes us think about our responsibilities not only in relation to God, but also to the human race

Saint Luke (Voino-Yasenetsky)


Remember that the Sacrament of Marriage is very important, for it is established by God Himself, and the first duty of the spouses is to love each other and to remain faithful for the rest of their lives. You seem to feel cold because of his former coldness. Therefore, there is a sin, and your conscience rebukes you, but you cannot change your own feelings. Knowing your guilt before God, you must ask for His help and forgive your neighbors – and you yourself will receive forgiveness of your sins from God.

Saint Macarius of Optina


In family life, everyone should be overlooking themselves entirely, thinking only about others. This attitude of family members to each other fuses the family together so that they all feel that it is impossible for each of them to live without others.

Holy Righteous Alexei Mechev


Being of one flesh, (spouses) have one soul and induce zeal for godliness in each other equally with mutual love. For marriage does not separate from God, but, on the contrary, is more binding, because it has more motives. Whilst a small ship moves forward in low winds, quickly carried on the waters with open sails – even arms can easily make it run with the help of oars – a big ship can not be moved by a light breeze. On the contrary, when it comes out to sea with cargo, only a strong and favorable wind can make it move. In this way, those who are not burdened with worldly concerns need less help from the great God, but those who are obliged to be the guardians of a loving wife, estates and children, those who traverse the vast sea of life, they need greater help from God, and they love God more.

St. Gregory the Theologian


Finally, your cohabitation must be unbreakable as long as you live: Christian love loves to the end, not for a while; it is firm and constant. There will be temptations for your love caused by the weaknesses of one or the other of you, or by the divergence of your characters and habits, or by people, by the arch-enemy… Overcome these temptations with courage; be wise like serpents, and meek like doves (Matthew 10:16); do not be annoyed, be patient, be indulgent, be strengthened by faith in Christ Jesus, who may always be an example of holy love, meekness, firmness, patience for you, dear groom and bride – your strength, your light and Guide, your Defender and Savior to death. Amen.

St. Hilarion of Optina

Prepared by Helena Somova

Source: https://obitel-minsk.ru/chitat/den-za-dnyom/2020/svyatye-otcy-o-brake

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